Friday, March 5, 2010


I hate to whine in the face of good news, because I am truly happy and excited that Greg got this job, but sometimes I get tired of doing 95% of my social activities solo. I'm friends with a good amount of both single and attached people, but half the time I come to our activities, be it group outings or hanging out with a couple, ALONE. I know, I know, it's what I signed up for. Greg's not even back in the air yet, but all the jobs he's had involve crappy schedules and limited time off when other people are off. He's been on mostly evening shifts and has worked lots of weekends at the hotel. Truck driving was just as bad. Obviously flying is/will be bad. I am not mad at him for it. I do understand he can't really control that. I've worked shift work, and night shift, and had crappy schedules too. It's unpleasant for the person doing it, but also unpleasant for the significant other that ends up alone so often. I actually don't mind the alone time at home, it's more the stuff out with other people ALONE that I mind, if that makes sense. I just sometimes get tired of being a third-wheel (or whatever wheel I am depending on the # of people) when I am ACTUALLY married and COULD have a date to something, but don't. I've gone dateless to weddings, countless nights out with friends, movies, you name it. Last weekend I had that night out with a whole bunch of friends, two of which were couples. Tonight a group of us are going to the movies, again, two of which are couples. I just want him there with me.
Usually I'm fine with it. It's easy to have a girls night out anytime, because Greg's usually working (or away when he's flying). Luckily my friends seem to completely understand about him not being able to come to things.
The one time I do get ticked off about it is when Greg has time off and still doesn't want to do ANYTHING social. It's like- throw me a bone, I spend a loooooooooooot of time doing these activities solo. It'd be nice to have my other half there once in a while. He's kinda bad about it in that way. Mr. Homebody.
Greg put in his two-weeks notice at the hotel as soon as he found out he got the new job. I've been planning a weekend away for a wine festival for a while now and our friends from Indiana are coming out for it. It's next weekend, which is the weekend before he leaves for his training. I had hoped that he would say that his last day at the hotel was Friday, so that he could join us that weekend, but he refused to. He didn't want it to be less than two weeks notice (it already would have been either way). I understand that he's trying to do the right thing, but at the same time, he's known for a while that the weekend is important to me and our friends are coming for it, and I very well might be "third-wheeling" with them, sans Greg, because he wouldn't leave the stupid job (that he HATES and complains about all the time) two days early. It kind of pisses me off. I feel like his boss at the hotel would have understood if he'd said that he just wanted a couple days to regroup in between jobs. Anyway.
I know that it'll basically always be this way. It's basically been this way the whole 8 years I've been with him. I know the schedules suck and I expect lots of time alone. I know it'll be even more annoying when we have kids someday and he can't be there for Daddy stuff either. It just sometimes gets annoying, you know? I can live with it, but it bothers me sometimes.


Joanna said...

isn't it amazing how we are all in the same boat! I am just about to write a similar blog because I went to church with kids, sans Steve, yesterday.

Yes, I have gone to weddings solo...yes, Steve is a homebody...yes, this all gets annoying...

at least we have each other to bitch to ;-)

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